Its been two months since lockdown has been declared. Everyone’s life has taken a hit. Few were able to run the show whereas few were stumbling with the circumstances. The disease Corona has disturbed numerous lives, made everyone to stay immobilized. It has knocked down the dreams of new entrepreneurs who were believing to start their own company. Trashed the life of poor with hunger and poverty. Every domestic animal on the street is wondering what happened to these hoomans, why are they not feeding us?. Made our own flesh and blood to stay away from each other. Doctors and every social worker are working their ass to save each one of us. The only thing that matters, we are safe at home, we are still alive. Regardless of being far away from our people we still have the technology to connect to them. Every day waking up to this quarantine how does it make you feel? sad, anxious, happy, or mixed emotions?

The first few weeks of quarantine was pure happiness to me. Being at home spending time with my loved one, making mouth lingering foods, maintaining a sparkling home, dive in every night into the Netflix and Amazon, scrolling through social media finding people doing gesture challenge, don’t rust challenge, styling their husband’ hair, etc. When days moved on the punch within me was sinking. Mouthwatering foods were replaced by Maggie and bread, felt nostalgic for Swiggy. Cooking every day made be tiresome. what to cook is another thing that ate my mind.

The later week, the tidy home became untidy. I always drew laughter, motivation from people around me. Unaccompanied by people being at home made me cranky. But still, I enjoyed being at home wearing casual pajamas, chilling out with Netflix, munching food at all times, dialing pals at random nights, no pressure of people watching me, needless to get dressed up, no people to judge me. Cuddling inside the warm sheets of my bed with my kindle made me feel so good.

The thought crossed my mind, in this period of quarantine I never had a chance to argue with anybody or be upset with anyone. Then it hit me that I didn’t have the social pressure. When we have social pressure at office or pressure from the family we bring it to our partner or our closed ones which turns out to be an argument. The only thing we are worried about now is to stay indoors and save our lives. In this period of quarantine, I never paid heed how my skin looks like, what dress I have to wear, whom should I please today, for what I am judged for. This reminds me that our ancestors had this kind of living as their normal livelihood, who had a peaceful, healthy, and long life.

My attention is all on me, myself, and I. What I can do to make this period better. How productive I can be to make the best use of the circumstances. I know its easy to let you down at this time. You might have all those ominous unwanted thoughts striking inside you. An empty mind is a devil’s workshop. Every soul has a problem to deal with, at the end of the day it is your choice to live with it or let it go. I am no perfect. I envy people who can utilize their time to the fullest. In reality, all are going through the same stuff we are into. But they push harder. I try each and every day. Certain days where I work on something in a full swing but certain days I am just a sloth bear lying in bed and scrolling through my mobile. The very next day I pen down in my journal and plan my week and try to be productive. It breaks me to think I wasted my day but I am grateful still I come back tomorrow with the bang rather than lying in bed again. These are the small wins. How many ever time you failback to do the thing you desire, come back again do it tomorrow until it becomes a habit. At all times try to find something hopeful out of uncertainties, life will have a different meaning. Don’t be too hard on yourself, its ok not being productive. Just chill out. Take the time you needed. Stay home stay safe.

xoxo,

Mita